“Grieving? Eh ‘di ba you only grieve when someone you love passes away?” Question mo.

Ayun ang akala nang marami, but it’s more than that.

Grief and loss 01

Hayaan mong i-explain namin sa ‘yo para mas maintindihan mo kung bakit lagi kang galit and irritated sa bahay, hirap or sobra makatulog.

Panay ang online shopping mo to cope with stress. Lagi kang pagod at walang gana kahit work-from-home ka na.

Yakap, Breaker! What you are feeling may be grief.

Grief and loss 02

Madalas kasi, ina-associate ang grief with death but grief is a response to any type of loss.

Sa situation ngayon, baka marami ang nawala sa ‘yo. If you have lost your job, your routine, connection with friends and family, plans and goals, financial security, and the like, you can grieve.

Just like when someone you love passes away, you also need to mourn for the losses you’ve experienced this coronavirus pandemic and tutulungan ka namin how to do it.

1. Your grief is important.

Ngayong alam mo na that grief is a response to any type of loss and hindi lang when someone dies, baka sabihin mo, “Compared naman sa mga namatayan, nawalan lang naman ako ng work so hindi importante ‘yung loss ko.”

That is not true, Breaker. Your grief is real and valid.

Grief and loss 03

“While it’s easy to look at your situation and compare it with others who may have experienced more profound losses, judging your feelings isn’t helpful in honoring them and moving through them,” Marnie Hunter explained in her article That uncomfortable coronavirus feeling: It could be grief in CNN.

Mas lalo kang mahihirapan kung every time na makaka-feel ka ng sadness eh isasaisantabi mo lang ang nararamdaman mo because you think others are suffering more than you.

Enough na, Breaker. Alam mo ang mas okay gawin?

Itong tip #2.

2. Feel your grief.

Challenging ‘to because nasanay ka na kapag nakaka-feel ng negative emotions, iniiwasan mo agad tapos tina-try i-distract ang self by online shopping, stress-eating, binge-watching, atbp.

Relate much ba?

Well, hindi naman ‘to masama sa una pero kapag sumobra na and it has become your coping mechanism, dyan na magkaka-problem.

Grief and loss 04

Basahin mo ‘tong sinabi ni grief expert Claire Bidwell Smith in article Why It’s So Important to Understand Grief During Coronavirus by Ellie Trice of Shape, “The effects that come from pushing grief away are anxiety, depression, anger, whereas if you can move through them and let yourself feel everything, there’s often some positive transformational things that can happen.”

You can’t believe it?

Dagdag pa ni Claire, “It can feel scary to enter into that space; sometimes people feel like they’re going to start crying and never stop, or they’ll fall apart, but really the opposite is true. You will for a minute, you will have your big deep cry, and then, you will feel that relief and that release.”

Try it and see for yourself.

Then, ‘wag kalimutan ang tip #3.

3. Let others know.

Hindi lang ikaw ang nakakaramdam niyan, Breaker, kaya ‘wag matakot na i-video call ‘yung close friend na mapapagkatiwalaan mo and tell them what you truly feel.

“Some people think they should be doing better or think they shouldn’t be having this hard of a time. That’s the first thing that we have to let ourselves off the hook about. For someone with pre-existing anxiety, it can be an especially hard time,” sabi ni Claire.

Nafi-feel mo ba ‘to?

Grief and loss 05

Sometimes, you may be too hard on yourself, thinking na dapat laging “okay lang ako” kahit wasak ka na talaga on the inside.

Ouch!

But remember, you are in the middle of a pandemic and nothing is the same as before. Tulad nang pag-show mo ng kindness and compassion sa friend mo kapag broken-hearted siya, ‘wag mo rin kalimutan alagaan ang sarili mo, okay?

“Support is so, so accessible right now—whether it’s in the form of online therapy, medication, or whoever you would normally turn to for a listening ear,” she said.

Grief and loss 06

So, gets mo na ba how important it is to grieve for your losses?

It may be a lot to take in but one step at a time, Breaker. At least, ngayon, naiintindihan mo na why you are feeling all sorts of emotions ngayong pandemic so magandang panimula ‘to towards your healing.

Pwede mo naman balikan ito any time and we have a lot of articles pa that may help you during this COVID-19 pandemic.

Gusto ka namin ipag-pray bago mo i-close ‘to, send us a text at 0999-227-1927 or call 8-737-0-777.

I-message mo rin kami sa aming iCanBreakThrough Facebook page or Instagram account or you can email us.