Break up advice #1: Iwasan muna makinig ng mga kanta ni Moira Dela Torre lalo na ang Paubaya.
Masaquette, bes! Napakinggan mo na ba ‘yun, Breaker?
Grabe ‘no? ‘Yung feeling na kahit hindi ka heartbroken, maha-heartbroken ka. No wonder she is the Queen of Hugot Songs.
Pero para sa mga legit na nakipag-break sa kanilang “Mahiwaga” during this pandemic season, sending virtual hugs to you.
Andito kami to help you.
Pasok sa banga ‘tong sinabi ni psychotherapist Matt Lundquist in an article How to Handle a Breakup During the Coronavirus Quarantine, According to Relationship Pros by Nikhita Mahtani of Shape, “It’s absolutely so much harder to go through a breakup right now.”
“There are a lot of uncomfortable feelings being brought to the surface as a result of the pandemic, and if you add those emotions to those of a breakup, as well as not having your regular coping mechanisms to turn to, it can lead to a really tough time for most people,” he explained.
Before kapag heartbroken ka, puwede kang lumabas any time to cope. But now, even though you are in a much more relaxed quarantine rules, hindi ka pa rin naman puwede lumabas bigla to go out with your friends or date yourself.
Mas madaling i-isolate ang sarili and sulk in self-pity and shame. Pero today, okay lang bang samahan ka namin?
Let us walk you through these 3 advices on how to deal with breakup during this pandemic season.
Break up advice #1: Ito na talaga ‘yung totoong advice – allow yourself to hurt.
Yup, tama ‘yang nabasa mo.
Baka nakaka-feel ka ng guilt ngayon because you think that what you are experiencing right now is nothing compared to what the world is dealing with.
Breaker, your pain matters.
“It’s important to recognize that although not all pain is equal in measure, yours is still true, valid, and incredibly real,” sabi ng Relevant in their article A Guide to Breaking Up During a Global Pandemic.
Or maybe, isa ka ngayon sa mga gustong makatakas from the pain by suppressing or numbing it.
Pero, alam mo Breaker, “it seems counterintuitive to embrace pain in order to stop hurting, but healing requires walking through the hurt and heartache – and allowing ourselves to grieve is an essential part of the process,” shinare nila.
Masakit pero kailangan mong maramdaman.
May full article kami about grief or pagluluksa. It will be super helpful for you to read it after this para mas maintindihan mo the importance of grieving well for your loss.
Break up advice #2: Rebuild your routine.
Isa ‘to sa pinaka-mahirap gawin kasi nasanay ka na palagi kayong 2, eh.
Sige, Breaker, pause muna and hinga nang malalim.
Then, kapag ready ka na, scroll down.
Aminin mo man or hindi, kay ex na umikot ang mundo mo kaya kasabay ng pagkawala niya ay ang pagkawala ng totoong ikaw.
Naku, Breaker! I-take note mo ‘yan sa next relationship mo, ah. (Ayan ay kung ready ka na, okay?)
Sabi nga ni relationship expert Monica Parikh from the Shape article, “that’s unhealthy, and just leads to codependency. Instead, your life should be filled with so many other things—like friends, hobbies, spirituality, exercise—that the relationship is simply the cherry on top, as opposed to the whole sundae.”
Nabasa mo ‘yun?
There is more to life than a jowa.
So, now na mas marami ka na ngayong time, set up activities in your schedule.
Perhaps, you can start working out daily, ipagluto ang family every weekend, buy a house plant para may inaalagaan ka (hindi nga lang tao pero puwede na), join an online community that meets virtually, or video call your close friends tuwing Friday. Mga ganern.
“This will help you establish your identity separate from your relationship and give you something to look forward to every single day,” they said.
Break up advice #3: Reflect on what you have learned.
Better if isusulat mo, Breaker.
Kailangan mo mag-allot ng time not just to process the breakup but to look within, your ex, and your relationship as a whole and see what areas you need to improve.
If not, sabi ni Matt, you’re just going to repeat the same old pattern and carry it to the next relationship na ayaw naman natin mangyari, right?
Pero. Pero. Pero.
Hindi rin natin isinasantabi ang fact na this is hard to do! Yes, it’s hard especially if fresh pa ‘yung pain.
We hear you. ‘Wag ka mag-alala.
Connect with an expert or a trusted friend who will “objectively look at your patterns and lovingly point out where you need to change your thinking and behavior is priceless, because most of the time, we don’t even know how we’re feeling unless someone asks us those hard questions,” sabi ni Monica.
Madami na ngayong online therapy that you can check out, Breaker.
Sa ‘min din, puwede ka mag-reach out. Text mo lang kami sa 0999-227-1927 or call 8-737-0-777. Sabi sa ‘yo eh, we will help you walk through this.
You are not alone.
Actually, bago mo i-close ‘tong article, we want to introduce you to Someone who has been with you through every pain and tear you’ve shed.
He knows and He is closer than you think.
Curious ka ‘no?