Bukod sa lies ang “Ikaw lang wala nang iba” at “Magkaibigan lang kami” ng ex mo…
Meron pang iba, Breaker sizt, gaya ng mga ito…
“Kasalanan ko bakit nagkaganito.”
“Ano kaya ang ginawa kong mali bakit hindi niya ako pinansin?”
“Dapat mag-lose na ‘ko ng weight para magka-boyfriend na ‘ko.”
Yup, you read it right.
‘Yang mga mean thoughts na ‘yan that you tell yourself every day are lies, Breaker sizt.
“These patterns and systems of thought are often subtle–it’s difficult to recognize them when they are a regular feature of your day-to-day thoughts. That is why they can be so damaging since it’s hard to change what you don’t recognize as something that needs to change,” explanation ni Courtney E. Ackerman, MA. in an article Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You (+ PDF Worksheets) by PositivePsychology.com.
Ang tawag diyan ay cognitive distortions.
Narinig mo na ba ‘yun?
Ito ‘yung mga “lies that our minds convince us are true” pero in reality, hindi naman talaga.
Naga-assume ka lang pala.
Definition ‘yan ng Ashley Addiction Treatment in their entry The Cognitive Distortion: Lies We Tell Ourselves.
Eto pa, “these distortions can arise out of our experiences and are almost a learned behavior of the mind.”
Mabuti pa basahin mo ‘tong 9 BreakThrough lies list para mas ma-gets mo.
Disclaimer: Kung hindi ka babae and you’re reading this, ‘wag ka muna umalis! Para rin sa ‘yo ‘to ‘no. Read on to know what we’re talking about. G?
Naaalala mo ba kapag sinasabi mo ‘to sa self mo?
BreakThrough Lie #1: “Either mapo-promote ako or magki-quit na ako sa company na ‘to.”
Ganyan ba ang thinking mo ‘pag dating sa life, Breaker sizt?
Para sa ‘yo, walang gray areas.
It’s either magaling ka or failure ka.
Tapos kapag hindi nag-work out base sa expectations mo, sasabihin mo sa sarili mo…
“See? Ang shunga mo kasi, eh! Wala ka nang ginawang tama.”
Ang sakit ‘no?
Pero that’s how harsh we are sometimes sa sarili natin.
If nakaka-relate ka, you have what you call All-or-Nothing Thinking or Polarized Thinking.
Isa ‘yan sa mga distortions na need mo malaman, Breaker sizt.
All-or-Nothing Thinking or Polarized Thinking “manifests as an inability or unwillingness to see shades of gray. In other words, you see things in terms of extremes – something is either fantastic or awful, you believe you are either perfect or a total failure,” sabi ni Courtney.
BreakThrough Lie #2: “They think na boring ako.”
Or “Naku! Pakitang tao lang ‘yan. ‘Di ‘yan sincere.”
Manghuhula ka, ghorl?
Itong next cognitive distortion ay mindreading.
“This type of thinker may assume the role of psychic and may think he or she knows what someone else thinks or feels. The person may think he or she knows what another person thinks despite no external confirmation that his or her assumption is true,” GoodTherapy said in their article 20 Cognitive Distortions and How They Affect Your Life.
Baka guilty ka rin dito.
Samedt, Breaker sizt, samedt.
Minsan pa nga kapag hindi lang nag-smile back, for example, ‘yung workmate mo, feeling mo may galit na siya sa ‘yo.
May mga ganun ka bang moments?
Akalain mong distortion ang mindreading?
May isa pa…
BreakThrough Lie #3: “Bakit kaya wala pang feedback sa pinasa kong resume? Hala! Hindi ata impressive ‘yung credentials ko. Hindi na nila ako tatanggapin. Jobless na ako forever. Hindi na ako makakabangon ulit.”
Pasok dito ‘yung kantang Maling Akala ng Brownman Revival, “Maliit na butas, lumalaki. Konting gusot, dumadami.”
Catastrophizing naman ang tawag dito.
“This distorted type of thinking leads people to dread or assume the worst when faced with the unknown. When people catastrophize, ordinary worries can quickly escalate,” sabi ng Healthline in their article What Are Cognitive Distortions and How Can You Change These Thinking Patterns?.
OA or overreacting kung iki-kwento sa iba, pero cinlear ng Healthline na…
“People who have developed this cognitive distortion may have experienced repeated adverse events — like chronic pain or childhood trauma — so often that they fear the worst in many situations.”
How about this?
BreakThrough Lie #4: “Hindi talaga ako kamahal-mahal.”
Sino ang nang-iwan sa ‘yo that made you conclude that, Breaker sizt?
Resbakan na ba natin?
Pero seriously, alam mo bang distortion din ‘yan?
Ang tawag diyan overgeneralization. “When overgeneralizing, a person may come to a conclusion based on one or two single events, despite the fact reality is too complex to make such generalizations,” sabi ng GoodTherapy.
May ganito ka bang thinking?
Isa pang example is sa friendship.
Naalala mo ‘yung time na nagtampo ka sa friend mo kasi hindi siya sumipot sa gala niyong magto-tropa?
Ayaw mo na siya yayain ulit kasi feeling mo that person will fail to commit to his or her promise again.
Nag-generalize ka na agad.
BreakThrough lie #5: “Dapat ‘yung mapapangasawa ko oppa.”
“Dapat sa Korea kami ikakasal.”
“Dapat 5 anak namin.”
“Dapat makapag-travel kami sa ibat-ibang bansa.”
Bes, hinay-hinay lang. Para bang to-do list ang buhay mo?
Should statements distortion na ‘yan.
Ito ‘yung “statements that you make to yourself about what you “should” do, what you “ought” to do, or what you “must” do,” sabi ng PositivePsychology.com.
Eh sa iba? Ganyan ka rin ba?
Kasama rin ‘yun.
“They can also be applied to others, imposing a set of expectations that will likely not be met,” they said.
Tapos kapag hindi nila nagawa ‘yung pinapagawa mo, g na g ka sa kanila. Minsan tampururut ka pa kaya ‘di mo sila kakausapin.
BreakThrough Lie #6: “I’m right and you’re wrong!”
Kaway-kaway sa mga girlfriend diyan na “always right.”
Kung wala kang jowa, okay lang ‘yan. This also applies sa ibang relationships mo.
Isa rin ‘to sa mga cognitive distortions ‘yung always being right.
“This thinking pattern causes a person to internalize his or her opinions as facts and fails to consider the feelings of the other person in a debate or discussion. This cognitive distortion can make it difficult to form and sustain healthy relationships,” says GoodTherapy.
Hindi ka papatinag sa sinasabi ng iba because the idea na baka mali ka is totally unacceptable.
Okay, sige. You won the argument pero kumusta naman ang relationship niyo after?
Struggle mo ba ‘to?
BreakThrough Lie #7: “Sus! Napili lang ako kasi wala ng choice.”
Ganito ka ba when something good comes sa life mo?
Kapag may nag-congratulate sa ‘yo, laging bukambibig mo “Sinwerte lang!”
Discounting the positive ‘yan, Breaker sizt.
“People who tend to discount the positive don’t ignore or overlook something positive. Instead, they explain it away as a fluke or sheer luck,” Healthline said.
“Instead of acknowledging that a good outcome is the result of skill, smart choices, or determination, they assume that it must be an accident or some type of anomaly,” they added.
Masyadong mababa ang tingin mo sa self mo kaya you reject the rewards that life offers.
BreakThrough Lie #8: “Bakit ‘yung iba hinahatid-sundo pa sa work, dapat ako rin.”
Masyado mo namang pine-pressure si boyfie, Breaker sizt!
“Hindi kasi ako puwede sa araw na ‘yan, eh. Paki move ‘yung schedule.”
Madalas bang naga-adjust in your own terms ang mga taong nakapaligid sa ‘yo?
Another distortion that you should know about is the fallacy of change.
Fallacy of change is “usually accompanied by a belief that our happiness and success rests on other people, leading us to believe that forcing those around us to change is the only way to get what we want,” PositivePsychology.com explained.
Shots fired ba?
Hindi ka nag-iisa, Breaker sizt.
Lalo na ‘to…
BreakThrough Lie #9: “Kasalanan ko kaya na-reject ‘yung project namin.”
Kasalanan mo bakit ang gulo sa bahay niyo…
Kasalanan mo bakit ka natanggal sa work nung pandemic…
Kasalanan mo bakit sila malungkot…
‘Yung lahat na lang kasalanan mo or pine-personal mo kaya tawag dito Personalization.
“This distortion involves taking everything personally or assigning blame to yourself without any logical reason to believe you are to blame,” sabi ni Positive Psychology.
Interesting ‘no, Breaker sizt?
For sure, relate ka in one or all of these cognitive distortions.
Actually, madami pa ‘yan pero 9 lang ang ibibigay namin para hindi ka naman ma-overwhelm.
Shoutout pala kay Dr. Aaron Beck and Dr. David Burns! Although madami ng researchers who have studied this, sila talaga ‘yung nagpasimula at nagpaintindi sa atin about cognitive distortions.
Famous sila for dedicating their careers sa pag-aaral about depression, cognitive distortions, and the techniques to combat these.
Check out PositivePsychology.com to know more.
Bakit importante na malaman mo ang mga ‘to?
Sabi kasi ng GoodTherapy, “Cognitive distortions can take a serious toll on one’s mental health, leading to increased stress, depression, and anxiety. If left unchecked, these automatic thought patterns can become entrenched and may negatively influence the rational, logical way you make decisions.”
Now that you know these lies…
Breaker, you can BreakThrough!
If these mean thoughts are taking a serious toll sa mental health mo, walang masamang humingi ng tulong.
It’s one thing to be aware, pero ibang usapan na kapag nag-take action ka.
Andito kami para sa ‘yo.
Just text 0999-227-1927 or call 0931-805-0802.
You can BreakThrough these lies!