So, iniwan ka niya. Ang sakit, ‘diba?
Or pinagtaksilan ka?
Itinakwil ng mga taong mahal mo?
Paano mo hina-handle ang pain na dala nito sa buhay mo?
Hinihiwalay mo ba ‘yung sarili mo from your friends or family? Isinusubsob mo ba ang sarili mo sa trabaho? Do you spend too much time on social media or online games? Lumalakas ba ang pagkain mo? Or do you resort to taking drugs, smoking, or alcohol?
Each person deals with pain in a personal way.
This is what you call “coping mechanisms.”
Coping mechanisms are methods or strategies often used by a person who are in face of a stress and/or trauma para ma-manage ‘yung painful or difficult emotions, according to GoodTherapy.
But then, ang mga ito ay unhealthy, ineffective ways of dealing with your pain. It offers an immediate yet temporary solution to your problems.
Mag ke-create lang ito ng mas malaki pang mga problema.
And if not managed the right way, pwede ‘tong mag result to further damage na tinatawag na addiction.
Not just with drugs, smoking, and alcohol but even with your use of the internet, playing video games, shopping, food, and work.
When you get addicted to something, you get a hit or rush of a chemical called Dopamine.
“Dopamine is the incentive and motivation chemical. Dopamine flows whenever we are motivated, excited, vital, vibrant, curious about something, whether seeking food or a sexual partner. Without the dopamine, we have no motivation.” according to Dr. Gabor Maté in his TEDx Talks on The Power of Addiction and The Addiction of Power.
It’s true that addiction gives you a release and relief from pain. That numbness and self-soothing effect na nararamdaman mo kahit panandalian lang, pinipilit mong punuin ‘yung emptiness and void that you have.
But the result? Unending cycle of shame, depression, anger, bitterness, and loneliness. Over and over again.
Dr. Maté said, “The attempt to escape from pain is what creates more pain, and that’s the reality with addiction.”
Do not run away from your pain but be with it.
Honor your pain, mag set aside ka ng time to reflect, and allow yourself to grieve. Reach out to your friends, maging part ka ng isang support group, and gawin mo ‘yung mga bagay na nagbibigay sa’yo ng peace of mind like praying and meditating, says in an article entitled Healing Emotional Pain: How to Recover When Life Crushes You by Sean Grover L.C.S.W. from Psychology Today.
Hindi mo kailangang sarilihin ‘yung pain na nararamdaman mo. Jesus said in Matthew 11:28-30 (TPT), “Are you weary, carrying a heavy burden? Then come to me. I will refresh your life, for I am your oasis. Simply join your life with mine. Learn my ways and you’ll discover that I’m gentle, humble, easy to please. You will find refreshment and rest in me. For all that I require of you will be pleasant and easy to bear.”
If you don’t know where to find a safe place to share your story, we are here to listen and pray for you. Just call us at 737-0-777 or text 0999-227-1927. Message us also through the iCanBreakThrough Facebook page and Instagram account or email us.