If you are going to describe your mother in one word, what will it be?
Maganda? Masipag? Masinop? Maalaga? Marites? Marisol?
Kulang ang isang salita para i-describe kung gaano kahalaga ang isang ina. Especially for LA Mumar, Coney Reyes’ eldest son, who grew up in a single-parent household.
He is grateful for how his mother showed her love and commitment to him and his siblings. But even so, he couldn’t help but ask, “How do I become a man if I’m being raised by a woman?”
It became a challenge for him, especially when they had a father and son event in school, and he had no one else but his mom to show up for him.
At first, he was embarrassed. But as time went by, he realized that it must be embarrassing for his mom, too.
That’s why he tried to understand his mom better. And he realized that even if you grew up in a single-parent household and was raised by a single mom, you could still become a better individual by the grace of the LORD.
And here, he shared tips on how you can nurture your relationship with your mother, especially when you’re in a single-parent household.
Nurture Family Relationships Tip #1: Keep your relationship God-centered.
No one in this world is capable of loving a person perfectly. This is sad, but it’s a reality. At ang dahilan nito ay tayong lahat, at some point in our lives, we were once broken and hurt. We were disappointed because of our loved ones and family, we felt betrayed by our close friends, and we felt abandoned by people closest to us. And because of these emotional scars, we can no longer love perfectly based on our human abilities to love.
But it’s not the same with the LORD.
The moment we receive Him in our lives, His Spirit lives in us, thus, enabling us to experience pure and perfect love.
He is love personified!
Kaya napakaimportante na you keep God at the center of your relationship with your mom. Dahil Siya na ang pupuno sa mga pagkukulang mo, or ng magulang mo. He alone is able to love a person perfectly, and you need Him so you can love others better, including your mother.
Nurture Family Relationships Tip #2: Develop a deeper understanding of one another.
Nakakalungkot isipin na madalas, ang mga magulang lang ang umiintindi sa mga anak. Gano’n siguro talaga, ‘no? Parents have the natural desire to give what’s best for their children, even if it means sacrificing their own little joys.
But you can change this. Sabi pa ni LA, “Intindihin natin ang ating mga nanay, and what they’re going through.”
You might not know this, but there are a lot of things na kailangan i-deal ng mama mo, mga responsibilidad na kailangan niyang panagutan, at mga problemang hinahanapan niya ng solusyon. Most of the time, she won’t tell you these because she doesn’t want to burden you. Kaya naman, the best thing you can do is to understand her.
Bonus na lang din na tulungan mo sila sa mga hugasin!
Nurture Family Relationships Tip #3: Communicate with each other.
Pansin mo ba na some parents are dakilang Marites at Marisol? Madalas nga, talo pa nila ang pagiging news reporter dahil araw-araw at sa aga nilang maghatid ng balita, halos alam mo na lahat ang kaganapan ng buong barangay niyo. Haha!
It’s because gusto lang talaga nilang may ka-chika. Kaya kung nagrereklamo ka sa pagiging Marites ng nanay mo, better to communicate with her na lang.
‘Yung parang you try to get to know her, too.
Alam mo ba ang favorite food niya?
Alam mo ba sino ang celebrity crush niya?
Alam mo ba ang story nila ng tatay mo?
Alam mo ba kung ano ang mga nagpapasaya sa kaniya?
If most of your answers are no, then, this just means that you have to make extra effort in getting to know your mother.
Also, one way of communicating with her is letting her know how you feel. Kung masama ang loob mo, ‘wag kang maghasik ng cold war. Talk it out in a calm manner and try to understand her side, too.
At dito na rin papasok ang ating pang-apat na tip.
Nurture Family Relationships Tip #4: Make a continuous effort to strengthen the relationship.
The key word here is continuous. Hindi lang tuwing gusto mo or nasa mood ka, but it is an intentional and consistent effort.
Kung kay crush nga sobrang dali mong mag-reply, how much more sa nanay mo na siyang dahilan kung bakit maganda or guwapo ka ngayon?
Ayiiiee, bet niya ma-compliment. 😀
Make a continuous effort to love her. Because like you, she needs to be loved, too. Kaya nga jowang jowa ka kasi gusto mong maranasan kung paano magmahal at mahalin, ‘di ba? Well, the good news is, you can do that to your mama, as well. Because we tell you, she deserves it the most.
Nurture Family Relationships Tip #5: Pray for God’s grace and strength to sustain you.
Breaker, aware naman kami na may hangganan talaga lahat ng kakayahan mo, even your ability to give love to people. Aware rin kami na ‘di sa lahat ng panahon, sobrang daling mahalin ang nanay mo.
For sure, may mga hindi kayo pagkakaunawaan, hindi pagkakaintindihan, nag-aaway at nagtatalo sa maliliit na bagay, or hindi kayo sumasang-ayon sa isa’t isa. Normal ‘yan.
That’s why you need to pray for God’s grace and strength to sustain you, always. ‘Wag mong hintayin na maging beyond repair na ang relationship mo with your mama before ka humingi ng tulong kay LORD.
Like how you pray for your jowa or future spouse, pray also for your mother. Ipagdasal mo na magkaroon kayo ng close relationship, and ask Him to give you the grace and patience to love her better. Again, parents find it hard to raise a child, how much more kung single mom, ‘di ba?
Dagdag pa ni LA, “We can have a good relationship with each other in spite of our shortcomings because nakukuha natin ‘yung love kay God. The relationship can flourish by God’s grace.”
This is a perfect opportunity for you to say thank you to the person who was with you from the very beginning. It’s your turn to show her that all her efforts, sacrifices, dedication, and love are not wasted and are being appreciated.
And to all the single parent out there, thank you so much for all the sacrifices! The LORD sees and appreciates your selfless love.
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